Make a welfare pledge to yourself
The healthier and happier we are, the more we can be there for others
It's not fleeting, or singular. The notion of 'welfare' might also be called the idea of 'going strong' because welfare is an ongoing mission. It is not about a burst of laughter or winning the lottery. It is about taking your life and individual needs seriously, and making sure you look after yourself. Organising your wardrobe. Going for a run. Practising a musical instrument. Settling down with a book. Drinking fruit juice rather than wine. Such behaviour might appear a bit egotistical, even rather selfish, but it isn't. If you commit wholeheartedly to it, it will improve your welfare immeasurably, which in turn will help your life operate a bit better, which in turn will help you to be there for others.
Welfare requires a bit of self-knowledge, it's true. I know that running makes me feel good, reduces my anxiety and helps me get my thoughts and priorities in order. Not that it is all easy, even after years of practice. The hardest thing about going for a run? Lacing up your shoes. Once they are on, you are out and off. It doesn't have to be running, of course. It could be walking, or cycling, or swimming. But the best thing is if you leave any and all devices behind. No music, no phone, no social media. It's not about anything other than being alone with yourself and engaging with the feeling of your body moving through air, or water; while your mind moves through your day. Even if it's only for 20 minutes, it has an extraordinary ability to reset you in positive mode.
Welfare needs to be a constant, pleasant hum in your life. To get it to that stage, it is wise to devote a small proportion of time to dishwasher stacking, clothes sorting or diary organising. Small, crucial tasks which, once achieved, reduce anxiety and combine to make your life roll around more smoothly. This smoothness will allow you to spend time choosing to do more obviously pleasant things, things which make you happy. I am not particularly full of joy because my fridge is tidy or my wardrobe sorted, but if time spent doing those two chores enables me to sort out breakfast easily, then I will manage to leave the house on time without forgetting anything, or join that Zoom meeting unfrazzled. Being on top of my commitments might mean I will have the space to have lunch with my 90-year-old father or watch a box set with my son. That is not only good for my welfare, it is good for theirs.
If we can set up these small but significant personal promises, these welfare pledges to ourselves that help us to 'go strong', we will all feel better.
